Hello my Socratica Friends! We’re here to help you be a GREAT student. Notice, I didn’t say PERFECT student. Do you expect that of yourself? You might be suffering from PERFECTIONISM. This ISN’T a good thing, even though “Perfect”
is right there in the word. Maybe we should call it Perfect-ITIS, so it
sounds like an inflammation. Which it kindof is: an inflamed sense that
you need to be perfect! Confession time: This is something I really
struggle with, personally. There’s this word that got in my head when
I was a kid: IMPECCABLE.
你好，我的苏格拉底朋友！我们来这里是为了帮助您成为一名优秀的学生。请注意，我并没有说完美的学生。你对自己有这样的期望吗？您可能患有完美主义。这并不是一件好事，尽管“完美”这个词就在那里。也许我们应该称其为Perfect-ITIS，所以听起来像是炎症。这就是：一种你需要完美的强烈感觉！忏悔时间：就我个人而言，这是我真正挣扎的事情。当我还是个孩子的时候，有一个词出现在我的脑海里：无可挑剔。
I don’t have any idea why I thought this
- it didn’t come from my parents or my teachers - but I really believed my work needed to be
IMPECCABLE. My penmanship had to be IMPECCABLE. My school uniform had to be IMPECCABLE. I had to get a HUNDRED PERCENT on every test, I had to be the best student in the class. Even though I WAS a very strong student, my
perfectionism got in the way of my really enjoying my education. Because I wasn’t perfect, I had a hard time
appreciating just how much I had learned.
我不知道为什么我会这么想——它不是来自我的父母或老师——但我真的相信我的工作必须是无可挑剔的。我的书法必须无可挑剔。我的校服必须无可挑剔。我必须在每次考试中取得百分之百的成绩，我必须成为班上最好的学生。尽管我是一个非常优秀的学生，但我的完美主义妨碍了我真正享受我的教育。因为我并不完美，所以我很难欣赏自己学到的东西。
I’m still fighting this tendency. I want to be the best I can be, but how can we strive for excellence in a healthy
way? We’re learning together today, Socratica
Friends. Let’s talk about how we can cut ourselves
a little slack and beat perfectionism. We’ll start by addressing our unreasonable
expectations. I’m not talking about our goals. Having ambitious goals you want to achieve
is terrific! Where it gets us into trouble is when we think
our goal should be easy to achieve.
我仍在与这种倾向作斗争。我想做到最好，但我们怎样才能以健康的方式追求卓越呢？苏格拉底朋友们，我们今天一起学习。让我们谈谈如何放松自己并战胜完美主义。我们首先要解决我们不合理的期望。我不是在谈论我们的目标。拥有想要实现的雄心勃勃的目标真是太棒了！当我们认为我们的目标应该很容易实现时，我们就会陷入麻烦。
We’re imagining some ideal outcome - like writing a beautiful computer program,
or getting straight As. What we don’t fully imagine is what it will
take to get there. Okay, all you perfectionist Computer Programmers
out there. How many versions of your code do you think
you’ll have to write before it’s fully functional? Experienced coders know that you should expect
error after error after error. And sometimes you have to compromise your
standards of writing elegant code just to
我们正在想象一些理想的结果——比如编写一个漂亮的计算机程序，或者获得全优成绩。我们无法完全想象的是如何才能实现这一目标。好吧，你们这些完美主义者计算机程序员。您认为您的代码需要编写多少个版本才能完全发挥作用？经验丰富的编码人员知道您应该预料到会出现一个又一个错误。有时你必须牺牲编写优雅代码的标准才能
get it working. It takes a LONG time and a LOT of effort to
get to your final product. So when you’re beating yourself up for not writing perfect code on your first try,
keep this in mind. NO ONE WRITES PERFECT CODE ON THEIR FIRST
TRY. Programming is a process of planning, deep
thinking, and trial and error. We admire beautiful code precisely BECAUSE
it isn’t easy to do. So why are you punishing yourself for not
finding it easy?
让它发挥作用。需要很长时间和大量的努力才能获得最终产品。因此，当您因为第一次尝试时没有编写出完美的代码而自责时，请记住这一点。没有人会在第一次尝试时就写出完美的代码。编程是一个计划、深入思考和试错的过程。我们欣赏美丽的代码正是因为它不容易做到。那么，你为什么要因为发现这件事不容易而惩罚自己呢？
Perfectionism can stop us from even TRYING
something because we think we know ahead of time we
won’t be good at it. We turn away from opportunities before they
even start. This is an example of All or Nothing thinking. If you’re not the best, why bother. Really? Imagine, it’s the Olympics, they give the gold medal to the fastest runner. Everyone else in the world should stop running? Don’t cut yourself off from an enriching
pursuit, learning, growing - just because you’re not measuring up to
some arbitrary standard on this day.
完美主义甚至会阻止我们尝试某件事，因为我们认为我们提前知道我们不会擅长它。我们在机会出现之前就放弃了。这是“全有或全无”思维的一个例子。如果你不是最好的，何必那么麻烦。真的吗？想象一下，这是奥运会，他们将金牌授予最快的跑步者。世界上其他人都应该停止跑步吗？不要仅仅因为这一天你没有达到某个武断的标准，就让自己脱离丰富的追求、学习、成长。
This is the saddest consequence of perfectionism. Not too be over the top about it, but honestly
- you are denying the world your brilliance. What if Beethoven didn’t share his music,
because it took him years to write, compared with Mozart who seemed to write down
finished compositions on his first try. We need Beethovens just as much as we need
Mozarts. {a triumphant Beethoven finale plays} YOUR perfectionism might look a little different.
这是完美主义最可悲的后果。不要太过分，但说实话——你正在向世界否认你的才华。如果贝多芬不分享他的音乐怎么办，因为他花了很多年的时间来创作，而莫扎特似乎在第一次尝试时就写下了完成的作品。我们需要贝多芬，就像我们需要莫扎特一样。 {演奏贝多芬胜利的终曲}您的完美主义可能看起来有点不同。
In fact, you may not even recognize that perfectionism is what’s behind your actions. For example: you might find yourself procrastinating. Do you put off writing a paper until the last
minute? Why do we do this? If you’re a perfectionist, it’s because
you KNOW you won’t write a perfect paper. No one can. That’s not a thing. But for some reason, you THINK that’s what’s
expected of you! By putting your work off, you give yourself
an out. Now you can say to yourself - “well, that wasn’t a fair test of my abilities.
事实上，你甚至可能没有意识到完美主义是你行为背后的原因。例如：你可能会发现自己在拖延。你是否会拖到最后一刻才写论文？我们为什么要做这个？如果你是一个完美主义者，那是因为你知道你不会写出完美的论文。没有人可以。那不是一件事。但出于某种原因，你认为这就是对你的期望！推迟工作就是给自己一个出路。现在你可以对自己说：“好吧，这不是对我能力的公平测试。
I wrote it in two hours.” This might surprise you that often, what looks
like a half-hearted work ethic is really perfectionism in disguise. This is another negative consequence of perfectionism
- you’re denying yourself the satisfaction
of rising to a challenge. How gratifying is it to do something perfectly
the first time? Fleeting at best - we may not even acknowledge it. But when you’ve had to really put in effort
and time, and even a little struggle - the success is that much sweeter when it finally
comes.
我花了两个小时才写完。”这可能会让你感到惊讶，通常看起来三心二意的职业道德实际上是伪装的完美主义。这是完美主义的另一个负面后果——你否定了自己迎接挑战的满足感。第一次就完美地完成某件事是多么令人欣慰的事情？充其量是转瞬即逝的——我们甚至可能不承认它。但当你必须真正投入努力和时间，甚至是一点点挣扎时，当成功最终到来时，它会更加甜蜜。
Another way perfectionism shows up is when you’re reluctant to say you’re finished
with something, because it’s just not perfect yet. That painting you started months ago. The novel you’ve been secretly working on
for years, that you keep re-writing before you’re willing
to show it to anyone. It happens to us all the time when we make
our videos! We have a phrase we like to say to each other
here at Socratica, to try to nip our perfectionism in the bud. “Done is good.”
完美主义的另一种表现是当你不愿意说你已经完成了某件事，因为它还不完美。你几个月前开始画的那幅画。你多年来一直秘密创作的小说，在你愿意向任何人展示之前不断重写。当我们制作视频时，这种情况经常发生在我们身上！在苏格拉底，我们喜欢对彼此说一句话，试图将我们的完美主义消灭在萌芽状态。 “完成了就好。”
You see, we spend a LOT of time writing, filming,
and editing our videos. It probably takes us longer than it should
to get a video out, because we’re always fiddling with our lighting
gear, or trying to get a transition in a video just
right, or tweaking the audio... we’re never going to make an absolutely
perfect video, and we’re trying to learn to accept that. It isn’t easy. We don’t have it all figured out. One way we’re hoping to improve is by getting
some help editing. If you’d like to see us make videos faster,
你看，我们花了很多时间写作、拍摄和编辑我们的视频。我们可能需要比应有的时间更长的时间来制作视频，因为我们总是摆弄我们的照明设备，或者试图在视频中获得恰到好处的过渡，或者调整音频......我们永远不会制作一个绝对完美的视频，我们正在努力学会接受这一点。这并不容易。我们还没有全部弄清楚。我们希望改进的一种方法是获得一些编辑帮助。如果您希望看到我们更快地制作视频，
you could help by becoming our Patron on Patreon! That way we can hire an editor who has a little
bit less of this perfectionist streak - but someone who is still good! Obviously. I mean, we are Socratica. We still want to make EXCELLENT videos for
you. Just...a little faster. So what’s the PERFECT way to fight Perfectionism? It may help to recognize the emotional reasons
for perfectionism. Research professor Dr. Brené Brown sums it
up spectacularly.
您可以通过成为我们 Patreon 的赞助人来提供帮助！这样我们就可以聘请一位不太完美主义的编辑，但仍然很优秀！明显地。我的意思是，我们是苏格拉底。我们仍然想为您制作精彩的视频。只是……快一点。那么对抗完美主义的完美方法是什么？它可能有助于认识完美主义的情感原因。研究教授 Brené Brown 博士对此进行了精彩的总结。
You might say IMPECCABLY. “When perfectionism is driving, SHAME is
always riding shotgun. And FEAR is the annoying backseat driver.” There they are, those emotions we’ve been
trying to cover up and push under the sofa so we don’t have
to deal with them. SHAME and FEAR. On the surface, we think we’re trying to
be perfect, but what we’re really doing is finding a
way to not get hurt. Subconsciously, we’re saying to ourselves
- if I’m perfect, I can avoid criticism.
你可能会说无可挑剔。 “当完美主义盛行时，羞耻感总是占据上风。而恐惧则是令人讨厌的后座司机。”它们就在那里，我们一直试图掩盖并推到沙发底下的情绪，这样我们就不必处理它们。羞耻和恐惧。表面上，我们认为我们正在努力做到完美，但我们真正做的是找到一种不受伤的方法。潜意识里，我们对自己说——如果我是完美的，我就可以避免批评。
If I never make a single mistake on the job, I won’t have to worry about being laid off. If I behave exactly the way they expect me
to, they’ll like me. Our perfectionism is all about what other
people will think of us. How do I measure up. The sad thing is, perfectionism is such a
shield against being vulnerable, that it also prevents you from being recognized
for who you really are. You never feel secure that people know the
real you, because you’re working so hard to put up
this false, PERFECT image.
如果我在工作中不犯任何错误，我就不用担心被解雇。如果我的行为完全符合他们的期望，他们就会喜欢我。我们的完美主义取决于别人对我们的看法。我该如何衡量。可悲的是，完美主义是抵御脆弱的盾牌，它也阻止你被认识到真实的自己。你永远不会因为人们了解真实的你而感到安全，因为你正在努力塑造这个虚假的、完美的形象。
So what can we do to squelch perfectionism, since it’s such an irrational set of emotions
and behaviors? Maybe the answer isn’t to push it down out
of sight, but rather to bring it out into the light. Journaling is great for this. Write your most unreasonable expectations
down. Like - I should get 100% on all of my tests
always forever and ever. Imagine that someone else was saying that
to you. You’d tell them they’re being ridiculous,
right?
那么，既然完美主义是一种非理性的情绪和行为，我们能做些什么来压制它呢？也许答案不是把它推到看不见的地方，而是把它带到光明中。写日记对此很有帮助。写下你最不合理的期望。就像——我应该永远在所有测试中获得 100% 的成绩。想象一下其他人对你这么说。你会告诉他们他们很荒谬，对吧？
Getting these thoughts out of your head and
onto paper can take a lot of their power away. You can also try DELIBERATELY leaving something
unfinished or not quite perfect. This can be VERY uncomfortable. We’re not saying you should do this for
something really important, like your term paper or a grant application. Start with something small, maybe something
in your personal life, like how you fold your towels. When you can let a few things slide, and see that life goes on, and people still
like you for who you are,
将这些想法从你的脑海中移出并写在纸上可以消除它们的很多力量。你也可以尝试故意留下一些未完成或不太完美的东西。这可能会非常不舒服。我们并不是说你应该为一些真正重要的事情这样做，比如你的学期论文或拨款申请。从一些小事开始，也许是你个人生活中的一些事情，比如你如何折叠毛巾。当你可以放下一些事情，看到生活还在继续，人们仍然喜欢你本来的样子，
perfectionism loosens its grip on you, just
a little. Another exercise to try is to do your job
once, on a basic level. Then return and add some details. Finally, give yourself one last pass to finish
the job. If you can’t get it done to your desired
degree of perfection in three passes, make yourself let it go. Remember, this isn’t your one and only project
ever - another project, another paper, another presentation
- is coming up, and soon. We’ve been trying this for our video production
- we do one basic edit, next we add in some
details,
完美主义会放松对你的控制，只是一点点。另一个可以尝试的练习是在基本层面上完成一次工作。然后返回并添加一些详细信息。最后，给自己最后一次完成工作的机会。如果你不能在三遍内完成你想要的完美程度，那就让自己放弃吧。请记住，这不是您唯一的项目 - 另一个项目、另一篇论文、另一场演示文稿 - 很快就会出现。我们一直在视频制作中尝试这样做 - 我们进行了一次基本编辑，接下来我们添加了一些细节，
and then one final pass to check for mistakes
and little special tweaks. We could easily, easily keep making more passes
through a video, but the more time we work on this video, the less time we have to work on our other
ideas. Big picture, Socratica Friends - remind yourself that perfectionism isn’t
helping. By increasing your anxiety, it actually means
you’re less likely to achieve your goals. And what a relief to be able to go through
life knowing that
然后最后一次检查是否有错误和一些特殊的调整。我们可以轻松、轻松地继续浏览更多视频，但我们处理该视频的时间越多，处理其他想法的时间就越少。大局观，苏格拉底朋友们——提醒自己完美主义没有帮助。通过增加你的焦虑，实际上意味着你实现目标的可能性更小。能够在生活中知道这一点是多么令人欣慰
your friends and colleagues know the real
you, not some fake perfect robot. Being perfect isn’t human. You can open yourself up to more truthful
relationships when you stop pretending to be perfect and start being who you really are. When you’re immersed in academia, or a high-stress
work environment, it’s easy to lose track of this simple fact: You are more than what you are good at. Focus on being proud of yourself for showing
up, doing your job, being reliable, being kind.
你的朋友和同事了解真实的你，而不是一些虚假的完美机器人。完美不是人类。当你停止假装完美并开始做真实的自己时，你就可以向更真诚的人际关系敞开心扉。当你沉浸在学术界或高压力的工作环境中时，很容易忘记这个简单的事实：你比你擅长的更重要。专注于为自己的表现、做好自己的工作、可靠、友善而感到自豪。
All of those things are in your control. We’re all about stretching yourself and
getting better here at Socratica. There’s nothing wrong with striving. But you can find a way to strive for HEALTHY
striving. It’s all part of being a GREAT student. Socratica Friends, we literally WROTE THE
BOOK on How to Be a Great Student. Buy your copy today! (available on Amazon.com)
所有这些事情都在你的掌控之中。在 Socratica，我们致力于拓展自己并变得更好。努力并没有什么错。但你可以找到一种方法来争取健康的奋斗。这是成为一名优秀学生的一部分。苏格拉底朋友们，我们确实写了一本关于如何成为一名优秀学生的书。今天购买您的副本！ （可在 Amazon.com 上购买）